This is a tough one. My last post was about losing my dad and it was such a monumental shift for me.
The only way I can describe it is to say that my life has been divided into two parts, before he passed away and after. Every new moment, every big event, will be marked with whether or not he was physically on this earth to share it with me. I have an excellent support system as I grieve and although I never wanted to have this particular thing in common with my husband; he has been my greatest, strongest resource🥹. Losing a parent, under any circumstance, is a difficult experience and continuing to LIVE without that pillar just makes things feel off kilter; kind of like trying to walk in a straight line after being on the Tilt-A-Whirl for the 10th consecutive time 😵💫. I realized soon after the loss that none of my cousins on my dad's side of the family have a living father. It's a club I never wanted to join but the membership was inevitable 😔. It's been almost 2 months since my dad died and I have finally stopped dreaming. I say this with peace in my heart because I was experiencing dark vivid dreams immediately after arriving back home in Portugal. I don't know if it was because I had his ashes with me or maybe it was my guilt in trying to get back to a 'normal' life but sleep was not easy. The worst nights were the ones where he would appear and tell me he's not gone; he would try to convince me that he was alive and that no one cares enough to look for him. My dad was a lot of things and one of his strongest traits was his stubbornness - this was true in the dream universe too. The images and the conversations dulled over time just as Kevin had promised they would. Now if I dream of him its more in the form of a memory; not so much an argument or confrontation. I have found some solace in talking to his ashes as if he is present in my day. I believe the Rule is, anyone can talk to themselves or to inanimate objects as long as it stays a one-way conversation😅.
I wanted to write this post for three reasons...
#1. Writing helps me organize my thoughts and feelings;
#2. It's been too long since my last update and
#3. Rob asked me to (this one's for you Rob P.😎)
The property for the rental houses is coming along nicely. The land is 'almost' ready; a few more truck loads of dirt to fill the last corner and then we can start packing it down and getting it level. I had the task of getting the water and the electric set-up which was a pain in the you-know-what but it's moving along. Kev has been treating the weeds that were overgrown on the rock wall that separates us from the neighbors and Tio Tony has finished the block wall on the street as well as the retaining wall coming down the driveway. The view is breathtaking (I am including a photo of our Zeus enjoying the property from the back seat of the car). There are two dogs on the street who don't seem to belong to any one and they are NOT friendly, for this reason, Zeus stays in the car when we go to the land. I received an email from the company making the wooden houses and they are due to arrive in Portugal (Lisbon) the week of March 18th BUT the company has no idea how long it will take to get from Lisbon to Pico because the tracking is no longer promised and the shipment switches carriers to come to the Azores🙄. We are hoping to have the houses no later than the first week of April🤞. The architect that has been giving us so many headaches has finally finished the first phase of the licensing, we are awaiting approval now from city planning. The second phase will be all the detailed documents regarding foundation, positioning, septic placement, landscaping and parking. If things stay on track we will surely have these tiny homes ready to rent for the tourist season of 2024😆.
As for our home, the weather has not been on our side. Kevin works full-time during the week and we only have the weekends to get our own things looked after. We managed to burn the rest of the wood and the tree debris as well as remove the roof off of the makeshift garage. This weekend is a big deal because we hope to get the mini excavator on the property and really do some damage. The weather will have to cooperate though. The ideal scenario is to get the renovations done to the cottage while we wait for the rental houses to arrive. I have been researching, editing and creating spreadsheets for the items we need to purchase like appliances and furnishings because we need to purchase everything x3. Tomorrow makes 5 months that we have been in Pico and we are bleeding money, hemorrhaging actually. We feel secure in the fact that we have/own all our land free and clear and we have no debt but IF this vacation rental idea flops, we will have to think of something else. Today we will be meeting with an accountant to discuss the tax structure and opening of our business entity. I will be updating more often as things progress. Here are a few pictures of the last two months which includes a surprise visit from my cousins to break in the New Year 🍾🥂🎉, our son getting engaged in January (we are so proud and happy for them both) 🥰💍👏and my Tia just had a birthday (75 never looked so good) 🔥😍🎂
This one☝️ is the leader of the Unwelcoming Party -
he literally chases our car down the street as we drive away AND
he tries peeing on our tires when we aren't paying attention.
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