No Walk In The Park

It's been a month since my last post/update and I am at a loss for words. I've tried sitting down to write and each time I am interrupted with something that demands my immediate attention. I'm not sure how to start because, if I'm being completely honest, I feel lost and overwhelmed. The construction projects, 12-14 hour work days, money draining the account like bath water and the feeling of being crushed by time (or lack thereof) is taking a toll that I did not prepare for. The lines of communication are wide open between me and my husband so I have that to be grateful for but today he used a word to describe our situation and it was spot-on, 'naive'. I am wearing this adjective like a Scarlet Letter. My job is our life. The decisions we make regarding purchases, the direction we take when it comes to timeline and hired help, even who to trust or believe when advice is passed on. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself but at the same time, I can feel the weight of truth bearing down on me. I should have been more prepared. I should have done more research on the construction process. I should have seen this coming before the mole hill became a mountain (pun intended because we live on Pico⛰️). In all of this stress and worry for how things will turn out, Kevin and I are steadfast on the fact that we came here. Our regret is not the move, its on how we handled our negotiations since arriving. It's difficult to say how we will get ourselves out of this sticky mess but I have no doubt that we will manage. Aside from some anxiety, sprinkled with some chest pain and a dash of heartburn from time to time, we are happy and healthy.

One day at a time, that's the mantra. There would be no point in sharing my personal journal if I wasn't being true to the facts. I'll update again soon, hopefully with an anecdote and/or more positivity.