UP week 10 Christmas Edition

'Twas the night we call Christmas and all through the house

The only creature stirring was Zeus, it better not be a mouse

The fridge, the freezer and pantry is stocked with care

In the hopes that lots of people will be coming around to share

Zeus is the first to be snug in his bed

While visions of Ferrero Roches dance in my head.

I'm sitting here braless, as Kevin finishes a night-cap

We both see 6pm and wonder if we could squeeze in a nap.

When outside we hear a big bang, much like a clatter

I raised a brow, and pondered, 'What is the matter?'

Through the patio windows, I could see a flash

I have no idea how to use a sentence around the word sash

Thank goodness we live in a place with no snow

This week was a fluke as we saw zero below.

Oddly enough, even in the cold night, fireworks appear

South Carolinians don't seem to worry much about flying reindeer

Since Zeus is afraid, he runs away quick

He doesn't like visitors either, not even St. Nick

"On Dinner, on Dairy, on Peas and Velveeta

On Corn, on Carrots, on Dark Chocolate and Bacon!

At the top of the table, seating from wall to wall

"Now, devour away, consume away, gobble away all!"

As the plates emptied, not a one could fly

It would be difficult to even look up at the sky

More food than I can handle, a tummy ache that came

With a food coma so epic I forget my own name

As I poorly rewrite this Christmas classic, I had no clue

It's a long ass story, truly, who knew?

And then I decide I'm committed now, it's done

The only one left reading this is probably my son

If I focus and really try, I can turn this around

I've got 20mins left before the alarm bells will sound

Back to the food, since I can't ignore my belly

Pausing for a bathroom break, consistency like jelly

I need to get these details out of my head

What the scale said this morning, as I stood there with dread

This week had some tough food choices, a lot of hard work

I declined many snacks, lots of treats and I felt like jerk

Now I get to exclaim, at 205lbs, with no proof in sight

"Merry Christmas to all and to all goodnight"